The Freeware Thread

Post by **Zenith Nadir** » Mon Apr 21, 2008 11:05 pm

So I've been hitting the freeware games pretty hard lately, after searching beyond the known borders of games like Cave Story (which is over three years old now, after all), and I felt like writing a bit of bumph about the ones I liked best. These aren't all recent games, they're just games I want to talk about because I can. I will also supply links and screenshots.

Noitu Love
You are Noitu Love, an eight-year-old boy with super speed and strength. You must fight Dr. Darnicus Damnation's army of grinning goons, the Darn robots! Looks like MegaMan, plays like Streets of Rage. This is an action game with huge explosions and awesome music, and is an excellent way to burn off some latent aggression once in a while. It also has some really fun bosses (especially the last boss). Noitu Love 2 was also released less than a week ago, but you have to pay $20 to get it. The demo is even more badass than the original game though, so I think it'd be worth it...

Bonesaw
You play as a hockey player, whose team has been kidnapped by an evil ref (placed into an interdimensional penalty box, no less), and now you have to run around platform levels fighting the enemy team and wild animals for some reason. The game copies aspects of the old Kirby games (especially the bomb blocks, which are actually quite well implemented) You also have a "Bonesaw" meter, which fills up whenever you fight, and every so often you get to unleash the Bonesaw. Oh man, the Bonesaw. Bonesaw just kills everything. Bonesaw... is ready. The game has horrible slowdown on some computers, so be careful!

Alex's Adventure
Conventional if slightly surreal platform game. Not a huge amount to say about this one, it's worth a try if you still wish there'd be a sequel to Lyle in Cube Sector. Some cool puzzles, a bit short though.

Darkside Adventures
Mario-esque platform game with a rich game world (and an excellent protagonist & NPC roles) which I enjoyed playing. Pretty straightforward. You are the arch-chancellor to the King of Imps, who is one day summoned from his vacation by the king to find Princess Daffodil's crown, which she lost during a rousing game of hide and seek. Too bad your inane quest is impeded by an altogether larger plot involving the "Faraway Star"...

Spud's Quest
Ostensibly a Dizzy fan-game (it even has a cameo of the guy), this is an inventory-oriented platform game where you have to walk around picking up items, using them on things to get other items, etc, etc. Faithful to the original Oliver Twins games without being derivative (okay, maybe a little bit), definitely worth playing if you like Dizzy. If not, well, this probably won't change your mind.

Barkey Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden
The year is 2046. Basketball is dead. You are Charles Barkley, once a famed NBA player, now destined for a life of shame and guilt living in the slums of Neo New York after causing the apocalypse with your Chaos Dunk. But then... a new Chaos Dunk is performed, and Barkley is assumed as the culprit! And Michael Jordan himself is leading the witchhunt! ohhhhhh nooooo... This game considers Space Jam part of its canon and is chapter one in the Hoopz Barkley saga, and is composed of equal amounts basketball trivia and JRPG satire. If nothing else, you can spend many happy hours playing "spot the ripped sprite" as you play through the game. There is a sequel in the works (albeit with a different programmer), which may even rule as much as this game. Don't worry if you don't know anything about b-ball, I don't and I thought this game ruled. It's a ridiculous scenario but played completely deadpan, but with just the right amount of silliness in the dialogue and game events.

Iwanaga
Alien Soldier clone set in feudal Japan. Really badass, great graphics. (too bad I couldn't take a screenshot, though I stole one from another site. sorry, other site)

Yume Nikki (Title translates as "Dream Diary", allegedly)
This is the game I've been posting random screenshots of in the Queen of Jellybean thread. In this game you play as a young girl who spends an unhealthy amount of time asleep, and you wander the corridors of your mind while asleep, searching for "effects". There is some REALLY fucked up and terrifying stuff in this game. It kind of plays like Flimsy's Town of ZZT, which means I love it. It's almost unnecessarily impenetrable at first, but stick at it and you'll reap the rewards. (Tip: get the bicycle from the "funny floor" area, it's directly left from the entrance)

Please add to this thread with your own recommendations! You don't have to add screenshots, but a description as to why people should want to play it would be a Good Idea

Mon Apr 21, 2008 11:14 pm

horay

Mon Apr 21, 2008 11:16 pm

here st et thing

Post by **Zenith Nadir** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 12:06 am

that flywrench game is pretty classy, lemmer

pretty fly, you could say

Zandor 12 · Post by **Zandor 12** » Tue Apr 22, 2008 9:24 am

I didn't care much for Flywrench.

Barkley: Shut up and Jam Gaiden, however, is a masterpiece and I should've started a thread for it when I played it last month.

Ellypses · Post by **Ellypses** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 1:31 am

A hockey player that carries a bonesaw...

That's...

FREAK'N BRILLIANT!!

Zandor 12 · Post by **Zandor 12** » Wed Apr 23, 2008 6:06 am

Flash games aren't quite the same as freeware but I like this game so there.

The Impossible Quiz
A very long and silly quiz game that uses strange logic and sometimes outright guessing to make things difficult and surreal. The above question, one of my favorites, requires you to pet a cat.

Commodore · Post by **Commodore** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 4:02 am

http://www.tigsource.com/features/vgng/index2.html

not really the best games, but some funny ones. found it thanks to a review of "rom check fail" on the av club site.

also thank you nadir for this thread.

Post by **Zenith Nadir** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 1:27 pm

the only thanks i need is more links to games. come on people, i know you all love free shit

In the meantime, here's some more things.

Trilby: The Art of Theft

Trilby, the English thief and protagonist of "Five Days a Stranger" returns in this prequel, a burglary simulator (which I'm sure must sound familiar in these parts...) in which he finds himself embroiled in a mysterious conspiracy when-- wait, that'd be spoiling it. The levels are awesome-fun to play through, you won't mind playing the same level for the tenth time if you screw up (unless it's level 4, play the game and you'll know exactly what I mean. Mash the keys to resist the brainwashing)

ROM CHECK FAIL

<skullie> rom check fail is really fucking hard
<lemre> i'm really fucking hard
<lemre> thinking about banning skullie makes me hard! i'm lemmer.

Passage and Gravitation

Two short games. Explaining either of them would kind of spoil them; play them through (it won't take more than five minutes each), then read the "Creator's Statement" on the download site.

Guardian of Paradise

Zelda-like pseudo-RPG by the creator of "Akuji the Demon" (a platform game which I liked, but was WAY too short). This game casts you as Tela, a purple-haired boy who, in order to cure his sister's mysterious sickness, must find the avatars of the elements to make his way to Paradise! Really nice, colourful graphics and some clever puzzles make this a joy to play through.

Scribbit · Post by **Scribbit** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 9:10 pm

Karoshi

It means "death by overwork" I think? It's a great antiplatformer, in that the style is like a platformer but the goal of every level is to die. Avoid health objects at all costs, while searching desperately for a sharp spike or a gun! Some levels make you do really weird things to win, up to and including dodging air bubbles in a desperate attempt to drown! From YoYo games' GameMaker, which Lemmer has recently informed me is what I should be doing instead of ZZT. I still have no clue why Lemmer abuses me so on IRC, maybe it's because I am with all due respect an IRC newb who would like some straight answers the next time I ask politely WTF IS GBELO-BOT!!! Ok, rant over. You should play Karoshi if you like coming up with creative ways to die in video games.

Commodore · Post by **Commodore** » Thu Apr 24, 2008 10:47 pm

http://agtp.romhack.net/project.php?id=lamulana

La Mulana

pretty big this one.

Schroedingers Cat · Post by **Schroedingers Cat** » Mon Apr 28, 2008 6:04 am

Nikujin: Fast paced ninja platformer that will have you screaming in rage at your computer to FUCKING JUMP NO TURN AROUND ATTACK ATTACK DAMMIT while you type with the little bloody stumps that used to be your fingers. Very addictive.

Post by **Zenith Nadir** » Mon Apr 28, 2008 2:52 pm

WHY ARE THEY ALL NAKED

THIS WAS MEANT TO BE TYPED IN LOWERCASE BUT THE CAPS LOCK WAS ON, sorry

Aplsos · Post by **Aplsos** » Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:36 am

Transcendence

A cross between a top-down space shooter and a roguelike. The gameplay's all action, but you can buy a wide variety of weapons, armor, and devices to upgrade your ship. Most of the star systems are randomly generated, along with the stations that appear in them.

The freighter is better early in the game (heavy armor, starts with an omnidirectional weapon), while the wolfen is better in the late game (being able to equip more than two weapons is a huge advantage once you start encountering enemies that are immune to ion or blast damage.) The yacht is just awful, don't use it.

Zandor 12 · Post by **Zandor 12** » Tue Apr 29, 2008 10:35 am

More naked funlarity!

Tekkyuuman

A deceptively simple-looking platform-type affair where you kill things with a mace. The levels get progressively fancier/puzzleish as you go on, with bosses every third level (the level 9 ninja does not like me). Shift jumps and Ctrl is the mace. Some guy named Ikiki makes these games, apparantly.