Yay! Fishfoods guide to the ZZT community #1 - Know your community members! Here are 11 of the most popular community personallities. Most people fit into 1 or 2 of these, though some defy even these most basic laws. I hope this will help new community members determine there future and give a proper identify to current community members. If I've missed anything major out, or added people to the wrong type, do tell! ------------------------------------------------------ #1 - Rebel without a cause The rebel is annoyed that nobody is doing anything wrong in the community. Frustrated with the lack of power abuse and the way everybody seems to be getting along, the rebel finds an easy route to infamy by MAKING SHIT UP! Usually the rebel will focus on an indivdual - usually a figurehead - rather than a group. They generally stay out of community affairs unless they see a good chance to make something up. They normally hunt in packs, sticking to the notion that if there's a lot of them, people might not notice the flaws and stupidty in their arguments. Unfortuantly for the rebel, they never win, and end up either damaging the community or turning into the people they are trying to fight. Be prepared for them to insult your family, personal life, and spelling ability as they struggle to find anything wrong with you. Almost everyone but the bitter oldbies will stay away from these guys, either from fear or apathy. They tend to make friends with curtains in an attempt to push them over the edge. Examples: Zenryoku and Dsone Previous Examples: Fishfood ------------------------------------------------------ #2 - The curtains should be pink, not yellow Curtains are the apathetic, slightly more intelligent versions of the rebel. They still fill the need to argue to get noticed, but on a much smaller scale. For example, rather than declaring that z2 is evil and run by idiots, they will point out a spelling mistake on a help page nobody visits, or suggest really pointless forums. Far more sly than the rebel, whenever this character is attacked, they will simply go into a defensive mode telling you 'they where only trying to help, you don't have to get all snappy about it'. After you back down, they mention to you that your one of your shirt buttons are undone, or your fly is down. Given time, these people can turn into the rebel if they wish, but generally are to busy getting married or being a fuckan nerd to bother. They stay out of big arguments because they don't really have any opinion unless the arguments runs along the lines of 'Black is white. Discuss' or 'Funk looks silly in that hat'. Examples: Mono, Cyq Previous Examples: Zenryoku ------------------------------------------------------ #3 - Knightt Lackey Being in the age group of 10-14, these people are not only the lowest type of community members, but one of the lowest forms of human life. The majority of them are natural sycophants, who usually attempt to suck up to other community members and ops first, and when this fails, run to knightt and suck him dry. Knightt enjoys the attention and fake sense of love and the newbies enjoy protection and a fake sense of being important. As the relationship is mutually beneficial, it can go on FOREVER. In time, the newbies sense of loyality and dependency grows, until he finally believes knightt is the perfect human being, and will do anything he says just to stay in his favour. Falling out with him usually leads to these people leaving the community, or - worse - going back to making really really bad games that look identical to SRPG. The lackey's never get anywhere in the community, prefering to stay in the cosy moist confines of knightts wings. Avoid them at all costs, and expect to be molested by a small army of these people if you ever make a negative comment about knightt or his channel. Banning them is usually easier than arguing with them. Knightt is more addictive than heroin, and they aren't going to change just because you tell them too. Examples: Starbux, Dogbreath, Godedrp, Ultima, 90% of Random Inc (including skullie!) Previous Examples: Nobody escapes from knightt's wing. ------------------------------------------------------ #4 - Retired Oldbie Most people who have been in the community for a good number of years find it difficult to leave. They will leave eventually though, and while never really 'coming back', they will hover around the community like vultures picking at people and things in much the same way as curtains. Unlike curtains though, Retired Oldbies will respond to an argument with 'So? It's not like I care anyway.'. Any attempt to point out that they wouldn't have started the argument if they didn't care will cause them to get annoyed and either swear at you about how much better it was when all this was just fields or leave. You can normally recognise those who will become retired oldbies by the way the leave. Never content with simply saying goodbye to friends and leaving, these people will make posts declaring they are leaving, and even go as far as leaving festivals. Some eventually join the community again, only to leave a week later telling us how jaded we have all become. Oddly enough, they always seem to join the lamest communities availalbe, with the exception of Chuck and gamingforce audio. Examples: tseng, crank, cait Previous Examples: chuck, C_A ------------------------------------------------------ #5 - Shut up and ZZT Shut up is perhaps the most broad archtype. The majority of shut ups are newbies who either don't want to or don't know how to get into politics. Some of them even go as far as saying 'power' doesn't exist in the community. 0f course it does, but for most shut ups, it doesn't matter either way. They stay rooted in the firm belief that spending 10 hours a day making ZZT games is the only way to have fun / be seen in the community, and most are to stubborn to ever see otherwise. While you probably wont find yourself arguing with them over anything but 'ZZT isn't everything', they can sometimes be more aggresive than they seem. Sometimes these people eventually grow up to become a bitter oldbie or rebel, but more often than not they fade away a few months after downloading ZZT because it not longer interests them. These people also have a habit of returning 5 years after they've left as a retired oldbie. When they don't get respect, they can be become hostile and almost always amusing. Examples: Piroteckie, Knightt, Nydark Previous Examples: C_A, breakout ------------------------------------------------------ #6 - Bitter oldbie The bitter oldbie is what the majority of people will become after continual exposure to the community. They will normally go through transitions stages, starting of as a rebel, moving through periods of shut up and ZZT, and eventually reaching sentience as an oldbie. After a while of being an oldbie, they realise they've done everything they set out to do, and decide to fuck around with the community a bit or leave. After all, it's not going to be around much longer, right? The bitter oldbie normally only argues with other bitter oldbies and rebels. The arguments can last for days, weeks, months, or in extreme cases years. Unlike arguments between the lesser forms of life like Knightt Lackeys and Shut ups, bitter oldbie arguments normally end up changing the community in some way or another. Smaller arguments happen once or twice a month, and bigger arguments a few times a year. You'll ALWAYS lose against these people even if you are right, because they have power, and you don't. Them's the breaks. Bitter oldbies will ALWAYS become oldbies through making games and time, not popularity. Examples: Fishfood, Nadir Previous Examples: Tseng, Knightt ------------------------------------------------------ #7 - I'm an oldbie?! These people generally become senior members of the community (ops or admins) within a short amount of time. This can be achieved a variety of ways, but never through making games. Sucking up and/or dating various members of the community can sometimes get you somewhere, but in general these guys are choosen through personallity and people skills more than who they are sleeping with at any given time. These guys eventually become bitter oldbies or, worst case scenario, knightt lackeys. Most of them enjoy the idea of having power, but don't use it. They sometimes back up bitter oldbies in their major arguments, but are usually more friendly with shut ups. A few of them still make games, but are slowly learning that IRC and mocking people is a lot more fun. Examples: VgameT, Vedic, Donut Previous Examples: Kracken, Madtom ------------------------------------------------------ #8 - Mr. Bored Mr. Boreds are normally people who quit the community and come back, without turning into a bitter oldbie. They wouldn't consider themselves part of the community anymore and rarely come on IRC and don't like the boards, but still hang around just for something to do to pass the time. They never make any games and very rarely involve themselves in arguements. They care little for community concerns but like to watch from a distance and sometimes shout random crap about 'Dance Dance Revolution' or 'Clock tower'. They are normally the most pleasant community members to talk to, unless you happen to be talking to skullie. Mr. Bored will eventually fade away as he makes the transititon to either another community or getting a life in the real world. Either one can take quite some time. Examples: Skullie, Lemmer, ry0, Igsel Previous Examples: None. ------------------------------------------------------ #9 - 1989 1989 is one of the stupidest most annoying ZZT members you can come across. Worse than knightt lackeys in terms of general annoyance, but slightly more sensible. These people sometimes like to pose as retired oldbies, but always fail. Their main goal is to try and become I'm an oldbie?! without being funny, interesting or useful. They do this by demanding not to be called a newbie and telling people they have been ZZTing for years but somehow never found the community. Most of the claim to be at least 18 and ZZTers for 8-13 years. They are easily spotted, and quickly crushed. Most will either leave forever or come back as a shut up under a new alias. Arguing with them is a fruitless experience, they have all the stupidty of a retired oldbie without ANY of the amusing aspects. Examples: See 'Introduce yourself' thread on z2 Previous Examples: Godedrp, Miakar, Raichu ------------------------------------------------------ #10 - Potential Boy The best type of newbie, Potential boy doesn't care for power, and thinks he never will. They have an uncertain future, and can still turn into any of the types, including knightt lackey. Generally though, those that stick with it become either of 2 oldbie types. Spotting a potential boy is simple. They'll have a calm attitude to community affairs, not so much apathetic as focused and interested. They won't take sides but they will give an opinion if forced. It's generally balanced and fair though, these people are hard to fault. Extreme cases become obssesed with pressure and fade away, sometimes under violent circumstances. Unfortunatly, potential boys are very rare. If the community lasts long enough, these are the people who will be running it when we leave. Until then, however, they HAVE a lot to learn, and its usually the bitter oldbies that teach them. They prefer to be friends with I'm and oldbie?! though. Examples: Project, Perhaps Boxtop Previous Examples: Zanno, Madtom ------------------------------------------------------ #11 - Nice guy 's finish last! Well, not always, but in a community full of thieves, beggars AND tramps, it's hard to maintain that lovely smile and innocent glint in your eye. These people have no real goals for the community, except to serve people and make people happy. As such, they are walked on by the rebel and sometimes the bitter oldbie. Even knight lackeys will have a go at these guys because they know they won't fight back. It's a very shaky road to walk down, and there's no rainbow at the end, just zenryoku holding up a 'turning into your parents sign'. Still, it's not all bad. In general these people are respected by the majority. Herc, for example, seems to be able to maIntain a scary air of coolness despite the fact he listens to eminem. Brainwashing may be involved in that case, though. Nice guy's are friends with I'm and oldbie's or bitter oldbies, and are attracted to innocence and purity, or in the case of kracken, .Offspring fans and a scary obsession with naked foxes. They stand a high chance of fading away or turning into bitter oldbies. The latter happens hardly ever, as the nice guys are impossible to anger. Think Ned Flanders, only living in Australasia. Examples: Madtom, Kracken Previous Examples: Herc #12 - Princess Breasts A varied catagory. It's basically describes any of the four women in the commune, though they can be split up into 'I have breasts please give me ops!' and 'I have ops AND breasts, and I can TOUCH BREASTS EVERY DAY, YOU IDIOTS'. Princess breasts varies in intelligence, but will almost always get ops providing the channel they are in is run by knightt. It's a little like the porn channels you go to where all the 'women' are voiced so you don't get confused. Some girls do actually DESERVE ops though, so make sure you check what type of girl it is. The easiest way to watch for our for phrases like 'hugz' 'lol' 'my love' 'orion' and, if you wish to count togepy as a woman, 'you r all idots fuck u'. Beware, some types, espically 1989, will pretend to be a girl to win your favour. These can be spotted by the way they have a penis and should be banned as soon as possible. Examples: Kracken, Togepy, Prick, Peach Previous Examples: WiL