Let Him Know Here His Balls Are Friends

[Zenith Nadir]

A normal day in the life of Axle
I wake up earlier than I wanted, due to noise in the kitchen. Someone making breakfast. Someone who can't NOT slam cupboards and smash dishes. No matter how many times he's been yelled at.

I try to check my websites. Most are down.

The things I was downloading last night got interrupted. I forgot to queue them to resume.
It made no progress.

So I get dressed. There's nothing I feel like eating. And it all requires cooking. TV dinners, $1 meals, ramen.

I get ready to go to an interview. I'm asked to take out the trash, and pick up toilet paper and/or go give Steph money to get toilet paper after work.

Steph's workplace isn't open yet, so I can't. I have to get it myself. I am the only one who ever gets anything. I am perpetually going to and from the store.

I wait for my bus, getting some $1 nachos. They're good, but my beard and mustache keep getting crap on them, and I keep eating my mustache. I hate my body. It's ugly. Noone could like this hideous body. I look like some sort of homeless person. My coat is ugly. It was free.
I can't afford new clothes.

I get on the bus. It's a short ride. I get off, and walk 2 blocks to get to the Walgreens where my application is.
I am early. Very early. I'm not even sure why I left so early. I guess i'm eager at a second chance.
Life doesn't give second chances.
I head to McDonald's after buying toilet paper and hydrogen peroxide. It was 16oz for $0.50. It may help stop my teeth from hurting so much. Brushing doesn't help. Nor does mouthwash.

I spend $2 on fries and a drink. But I get sick before finishing, nauseated, and don't feel like finishing them. I talk to a clerk who encourages me to apply for a job there. I ask for a pen, but the manager at the store contradicts the employee, saying they're not hiring.
He refuses to give me one of the five pens in his shirt, so I can fill the app out.
I sit and wait for a while, until it's time for my interview.
The manager asks me to leave. No loitering.
The fries are still on the tray in front of me, as is the drink.

I leave. Before I get back to the Walgreens, I suddenly have to go to the bathroom. Badly.
I soil myself a little, because noone in the area has a public restroom. I have to walk 3 blocks to a subway. They use the micro-rolls on spools that don't turn. So you never get more than 2-3 squares, and they're the size of a ciagerrete pack each.
I vomit from the smell.

I left my two packs (8 rolls) of toilet paper and hydrogen peroxide on a table while I did my business.

They're gone when I come back.
I found the rolls outside, the packages torn open and trees covered with them. Someone stole my $2.50 of stuff and destroyed it.
$2.50 I had borrowed anyway.

I stuff what is left in my pockets and go wait at walgreens for ten minutes.

They give me a second assessment. The first was online, when I applied. 100 questions, all personality-based. None relevent.
This was 50. All math problems. I felt like I was back in middle school. I felt retarded.

I had an interview. The manager didn't seem to care about my answers. It was all routine. Hired or not, she doesn't care. Not about me, or her job, or Walgreens.

I then go to head home. I wait for 45 minutes on the bus. It's very cold.
Two teenagers approach me. Both girls.
They make fun of me. They call me shaggy, ugly, dirty, etc.
They think I couldn't hear them.

I cry.


After half an hour of being cold and taunted, with torn rolls of toilet paper stuffed into my coat pockets, looking homeless AND retarded... the bus comes.

My transfer expired. In fact, it expired before I got it: The driver didn't give me the right transfer.
So I have to pay another $1.75. A $1.75 I borrowed anyway. That I wasn't supposed to spend.

I ride home. Walk home.
I come in, and set $19 on Shen's money area, to replace the $20 he had given me for toilet paper.
I had spent $6.27.
I take the last of my money (change) and give him $19, because I felt bad for ending up only getting three rolls.


Shen asks how it goes. I declined to tell him. He always gives some reply like 'it sucks' and that's all. He never cares. He has never shown any sympathy to anyone but himself.
He never apologizes for what I do for him. He rarely thanks me. He expects it from me. Everything I do.
And he wants more.

I begin typing this.

Steph comes home. She seems surprised i'm here. She goes to her room. Her and Shen argue over something, as usual. They always argue. At least once a day. Usually three or four. Sometimes more. Usually over who takes care of the baby or who's feelings are more important. They also fight a lot about doing house chores. Cooking, cleaning, taking out the trash.
I end up doing most of it just so they'll stop screaming.


And now i'm here. I'll vegitate a while, then go to bed.


And tomorrow, like every day?
I'll wake up, a little more broken than before.

[Scribbit]

My friend is a programming teacher at a local high school, where there are two programming classes -- one taught by him and one by another teacher. Recently he spent WEEKS preparing the major assessment that both classes would do, a large assignment that the students would work on for the next few months.

As well as making the question sheet for the students, he also made an answer sheet for the other teacher, so that she could familiarize herself with the assignment before giving it to her class.

But this other teacher knows NOTHING about programming and wasn't able to tell the difference between the question sheet and answer sheet, and so she wound up photocopying the answer sheet and handing it out to every student in her class.

She no longer teaches programming.

[Zenith Nadir]

Rain keeps falling down
I'll leave this northern town
I'll run from your mentality
And leave you all behind, you'll see
There's no more giving up
And no more giving in to you
Cause I have dreams to realise
It's burning in my heart, you'll see

Rock'n'Roll is all I wanna do
Rock'n'Roll is all I wanna do
Rock'n'Roll is all I wanna do
Rock'n'Roll is all I want from you

No more shattered dreams
For what I could have been
I'll escape reality
And shape my destiny, you'll see
It's my turn to shine
To set the world alight
What will be will always be
It's burning in my heart, you'll see

Rock'n'Roll is all I wanna do
Rock'n'Roll is all I wanna do
Rock'n'Roll is all I wanna do
Rock'n'Roll is all I want from you

[nuero]

[Alexis Janson]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/c ... cature.jpg

[Zenith Nadir]

OK, the DUMNIST villian is Mrs Retardma, AKA, Hillary Clinton. She has not only the powers to look like "Gollum" from "Lord of the Rings", but has the balls to STILL be married to Mr Homobo, AKA, Bill Clinton. Add that G4!

[Zenith Nadir]

i am a gay, corpulent dwarf with diabetes. i am severely jaundiced. i am jewish and homosexual. i am handicapped, but not handicapable, and also mexican. i have glaucoma. i am from turkey. i am a 9 year old black muslim. i love baubles and doodads. i am an uncircumcised nascar dad. i am only wearing a peru flag. i am a gay conservative. i am against kwanza. i live with my parents. i am on disability. i am on welfare. i am 7 feet tall. i am against gays. i love the koran and islam. i want to walk someday. i live in a bunker. i am an animal. i am a soccer ghoul. i live in a yurt. i don't believe the holocaust. i live in a tent. i am a proud anime dad. i am a gracious grandpa. i am a gay gramp. i love kwanza. i love diabetes. i am against anime. i want to be an anime. i am from peru. i am a gay peru granddad. i am only wearing moccasins. i am only wearing a fanny pack filled with medical supplies. i am against dwarfs. i am a nascar muslim. i love weed. i have high-functioning autism. i am an arab dwarf. i am a wiccan dad. i am a deranged nascar papa. i am a humble, gay muslim. i eat moss. i eat bones. i eat bags. i am from carlsbad caverns. i am a wiccan burn victim. i am against islam. i work in a satchel factory. i work in a koran factory. i am a muslim soccer gramp. i am a gay soccer muslim. i am 11 years old. i am an anime. i love glaucoma anime. i am from chad. i am a gay chad dwarf. i am a soccer vamp. i love weed and soccer. i love weed and the torah. i love cooters. i love a girl's snatch. i love a girl's cooch. i love a gay dad's anime dick. i love a gramp's swollen soccer dick. i am an uncircumcised puerto rican pap pap. i love a gay kwanza fiesta. i am from kwanza. i am an autistic anime soccer dad. i am only wearing a soccer bag. i am the dad of your dreams. i am a wiccan grandpa in the sewers. i live in the sewers. i am 3 feet tall. i am looking at a koran with binoculars. i am looking at a cooter with binoculars. i love a gay dwarf's cooter.

- bart simpson

[Zenith Nadir]

the car’s on fire and there’s no driver at the wheel
and the sewers are all muddied with a thousand lonely suicides
and a dark wind blows

the government is corrupt
and we’re on so many drugs
with the radio on and the curtains drawn

we’re trapped in the belly of this horrible machine and the machine is bleeding to death

the sun has fallen down and the billboards are all leering
and the flags are all dead at the top of their poles

it went like this: the buildings tumbled in on themselves
mothers clutching babies picked through the rubble and pulled out their hair

the skyline was beautiful on fire
all twisted metal stretching upwards
everything washed in a thin orange haze

i said: “kiss me, you’re beautiful -these are truly the last days”

you grabbed my hand and we fell into it, like a daydream or a fever

we woke up one morning and fell a little further down -
for sure it’s the valley of death

i open up my wallet and it’s full of blood

[Scribbit]

Guvf VF zl jvggl fvtangher.

[Dr. Dos]

http://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/20070501.gif

[Commodore]

Anyway, Master Razed in Black, even though you're named after a band full of plunger suckin' fags, you can make a damn good game, so you're a bad motherfucker in my book. Let's hook up after I get off my shift some day and go find us some sluts.

[zamros]

aplsos wolf DEAD! Day 4
beanjo DEAD! Night 1
dave2 alpha wolf DEAD! Day 4
guy guardian
j factor DEAD! Day 2
lemmer warrior sibling
mr alert wolf DEAD! Day 3
nuero seer
orbt silver bullet DEAD! Night 2
skullie sibling DEAD! Night 3

[Dr. Dos]

did we start playing werewolf again?

[Zenith Nadir]

i'll join

[Scribbit]

Oh, I love that game! Never played it on a forum tho.