In your adventures through the Town of ZZT, you have been captured by the evil Dungeon Guards. Not recognizing you as the great escape artist you are, the guards have thrown you in the Dungeons of ZZT.
Oh what a wondeful world we live in. Where would we be without lewd statues hewn of stone, without dangerous leaders with those cheesy grins, without ALCOHOL, without those pseudo-villains who drive around playin' loud RAPfgvjfvf eeeeevldfg dfdf excfd cough fef music, without squeezy Toooys, and without those special people who just amaze us all? eh? We'd be in the shitz, that's where we'd be, boyz.
Except for the squeezing one, those are all too large. Also, they suck, because none of them really have any discernable use. Now, what we need are emoticons like
or
or quite possibly