FIRST TIME GETTING DRUNK ON THE WEB HOLY SHIT

For maximum coolness, tell people on the Internet you're high or drunk. Everyone loves it, and it makes you "hella" cool.

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Mooseka
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FIRST TIME GETTING DRUNK ON THE WEB HOLY SHIT

Post by Mooseka »

you fucking pansies liven up jesus christ.
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Why-Fi
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Re: FIRST TIME GETTING DRUNK ON THE WEB HOLY SHIT

Post by Why-Fi »

Mooseka wrote:you fucking pansies liven up jesus christ.
I'm god. Shut up, mortal.
Hello, here am I, Why-Fi!!!!!
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Schroedingers Cat
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Post by Schroedingers Cat »

Kindly shut the fuck up, Mr. Fi. You aren't god AND YOU NEVER WILL BE. Calling people "mortal" isn't funny either.
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Mooseka
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Post by Mooseka »

what the fuck is this
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Post by Fungahhh »

WHAT THE FUCK!
fungahhh
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Shadow Mage
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Post by Shadow Mage »

Schrödinger's Cat wrote:Kindly shut the fuck up, Mr. Fi. You aren't god AND YOU NEVER WILL BE. Calling people "mortal" isn't funny either.
Besides, stak we arn't even sure if Schrödinger's Cat here is even mortal or not.
Meh, can't beleive how little I come to these forums now.
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Post by nuero »

What.
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Post by Fungahhh »

Remember drugs?
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Post by Shadow Mage »

Oh right.
Meh, can't beleive how little I come to these forums now.
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Surlent
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Re: FIRST TIME GETTING DRUNK ON THE WEB HOLY SHIT

Post by Surlent »

Why-Fi wrote:
I'm god. Shut up, mortal.
lol mormon :adomisfreewareyoudontneedacrackorserialnumbertopl
JESUS CHRIST- You start the New Testament
with this Jesus. He is so superpowered and awesome, you feel converted. You place your hope in this Jesus.
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Schroedingers Cat
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Post by Schroedingers Cat »

Who would have thought that Jazzy would be the one poking fun at religion?
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Quantum P.
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Post by Quantum P. »

He's not necessarily pro-religion. He's just pro-Christianity.*

*Well, mainstream Christianity. Whether or not Mormons are Christians depends on who you ask (Mormons believe in Christ, but they reject some of the traditional beliefs of the church). So, uh, yeah.
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Post by Surlent »

The following can be safely ignored for those who don't really give a crap.



Just for clarification: Mormons believe that Christ's death allows them to become happy little gods of their own planets, contrary to Christ's teachings (for instance, John 3:16, which asserts that Christ came exculsively to save people from their sins). Among their other bizzare teachings is that people all preexisted on some other planet as spirit people or something, and there all these different gods had tons of children. They claim that Yahweh was one of these gods and had two children. They claim that Yeshua (Jesus) and Lucifer are biological brothers, and that there was some sort of war. They claim that all can become gods by proving themselves worthy. They say that Yeshua and Lucifer had the above war because both wanted to become the "saviour" of Earth by telling them that they could become gods by following Mormon teachings and Lucifer wanted to force everyone to, wheras they say Yeshua wanted to give people a choice like on other planets. Sounds kind of like Battlestar Galactica or something, eh? Oh, and they think that in this war, the people who were neutral were "cursed to be born with black skin", and hence the Negro race. They also claim that despite the archeological evidence, and DNA evidence, that the native Americans were some "lost tribe" of Israelites and that a whole bunch of crap happend here before we white guys got to it. They claim that a man named Joseph Smith discovered some sort of golden plates with all this stuff written on it and translated it with the help of a being named Moroni. Apparently, it took him several tries to get the plates, and if I remember correctly, something happend to his original transcription and he had to redo it. Interestingly, he had a group of people sign a document about the plates, saying that they witnessed them, and each providing their own account of it. Oddly enough, their accounts seem to contradict each other, especially when it comes to the weight of the tables. I think that's about it in a nutshell.
JESUS CHRIST- You start the New Testament
with this Jesus. He is so superpowered and awesome, you feel converted. You place your hope in this Jesus.
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Post by Fungahhh »

It's a good thing Christianity is the One True Faith, huh, Jazzy
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Post by Surlent »

*shrugs* It just happens to be the only one supported by actual evidence. You can scientifically disprove pretty much any mythology/religion based on their own holy books or teachings, but interestingly, the Bible seems to stand. It obviously is not a scientific textbook, but when it does comment on something scientific, it is with uncanny accuracy and insight. Two common examples of this are found in the OT Wisdom books where it mentions that 1) The wind revolves on a circuit and 2) There are currents deep under the sea. It is also worth noting the strange Mosaic laws regarding purity and such, in that they correspond to current medical knowledge, for instance in not eating pork due to it's quick spoilage, and washing hands with running water as opposed to still water in a basin, and various other healthful practices. This is extremely uncanny due to the fact that Moses was raised by Egyptian royalty and received the same education as any other Egyptian. The Egyptians, while being undoubtedly genius architects and such, had notoriously poor medical knowledge. I don't have my sources on me at the moment, but I do remember that one popular medicine for crying infants was basically poison and had fly defecation as an essential ingredient. Anyway, back to talking about how high everyone is and how drunk they're going to get tonight...
JESUS CHRIST- You start the New Testament
with this Jesus. He is so superpowered and awesome, you feel converted. You place your hope in this Jesus.
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