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I agree. Take me to the spicy page.
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 Post subject: A true story
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 9:06 am 
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wacky morning DJ
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"Here it is, little girl," Madtom had called, waving Kracken’s fluffy pink diary in the air. "I found it!" Now, seated beside her on the bench, he felt the tug of unexpected emotions. It was oddly gratifying to have her smiling at him and teasing him, smooshed up against him, casually including him in her circle of friends. It was even odder to feel the pressure of her body as she sat beside him, playfully shoving him and leaning on him. He was aware of her body heat, and her arm brushing his. It made him tingle. Strange little jolts of energy moved up his spine. His cock stirred.

He looked down at her, and she smiled up at him trustingly. For the first time Madtom had a sneaking suspicion of why that rambunctious goody-goody nadir spent so much time in the company of this little twerp...this feminine, lithe, appealing little twerp. It would serve nadir right, Madtom thought as Kracken bounced up to dance with the superhero, if somebody else decided to "dance" with her. Madtom chortled, and sat up straighter, as the brilliance of this scheme sank in. "After all, she likes me," he muttered gleefully to himself. "And I know nadir likes her. I bet he’d be a lot less energetic if he lost his little friend -- to me!"

There was no point in attempting anything in front of all these people, though. Madtom slipped away, unnoticed, to work out the details of his scheme.

Back in his lair he looked over his costumes. "Too brainy," he said, rejecting a scientist’s labcoat and thick glasses. "Too flamey," he said, discarding a fireman’s uniform. "Too same-y," he sneered, passing a purple striped suit exactly like the one he was wearing. "Perfect!" he exclaimed, when he reached a police-officer’s costume. "Children trust the police. Now all I need to do is catch her when she’s alone, instead of surrounded by those pesky friends of hers."

That part proved easy. Concealed behind some bushes, he waited patiently. At dusk Kracken, her pink backpack bouncing up and down on her back, skipped down the sidewalk on her way to her uncle’s house. Madtom watched her hungriliy. "Once I make her mine," he told himself under his breath, "she’ll love me, and forget all about her foolish nadir."

Kracken heard the muttering. "Who’s there?" she called, taking an involuntary step backwards in alarm as Madtom popped up suddenly.

"Don’t be afraid, little girl," he said. "I am a policeman." And Kracken, failing to recognize Madtom in his uniform and false moustache, took a trusting step closer.

"Is something wrong, officer?" she asked. He smirked at her clear-eyed earnestness.

"Yes," he said. "I am investigating a...a theft, yes. Will you help me?"

"If I can," she said.

"It’s a theft of clothing," he said, improvising wildly. "If you could just come with me." He led her behind the bushes, and then leaned forward conspiratorially. "I’m afraid," he whispered, "that the dress you’re wearing looks exactly like the one that was stolen."

"Oh, dear!" Kracken said, her eyes widening. "But this one is mine. Honest!"

"Oh, I’m sure you’re telling the truth," he assured her. "But I need to check. I’m sure you understand. If you could just slip it off for a minute, I could check the inside for evidence." She looked uncertain. "You can trust me," he leered. "I’m a policeman."

"Well, yes," she said, still doubtful. "I guess I can." She dropped her backpack on the leaf-strewn ground and pulled her pink-striped dress off over her head.

He wordlessly took the dress, but made no move to examine it. Insterad he stood, looking at her. She was shivering slightly, and goosebumps were visible on her delicate arms and legs. She’d be warmer underneath me, he thought, flushing with desire. "You know, you’re a beautiful young lady," he said, hisASDFL;KA J#*% &*$(BLG K#%V 9BU490J HGJKLTH


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 2:44 pm 
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<:D

Joined: Fri May 13, 2005 6:37 am
Posts: 886
I hate you.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 11:19 pm 
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this is my hammer
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Joined: Wed Mar 12, 2003 11:40 am
Posts: 2767
Location: between the black and white spiders
rated a++ can't wait for the next installment

this is my reaction to the whole "madtom had sex with kracken" thing:

Image

imagine jhonen vasquez is me. that can't be too hard. also sorry that scan is spotty, i blame the book i took it from

it's pretty funny if it did actually happen, though i wouldn't have pegged either of them to be the type to fuck someone within three hours of meeting them (you sluts)

it's still funny though, even if it didn't!

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he looked upon the world and saw it was still depraved :fvkk:

Overall: Rotton egg for breakfast


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Dec 03, 2005 9:14 am 
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this is my hammer
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Location: between the black and white spiders
http://www.livejournal.com/users/madtom/220248.html

DECEPTION AND DECEIT

i am crying now

i wanted madtom to make the hot fuck for real but he LIED

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he looked upon the world and saw it was still depraved :fvkk:

Overall: Rotton egg for breakfast


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Dec 03, 2005 3:20 pm 
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<:D

Joined: Fri May 13, 2005 6:37 am
Posts: 886
well i suppose it depends on your chosen interpretation of the words 'met' and 'nice' but there you go

as boonob said he and andrew were both there and if we'd fucked raw on the starbucks table with intermittent black metal screams i'm pretty sure they'd've noticed something


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Dec 03, 2005 7:45 pm 
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OH YES! USE VINE WHIP! &lt;3
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Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2001 9:11 am
Posts: 1745
Location: scabsboro
unless BOONOB Boom =D WITH ANDREW at the same time.

_________________
<asgromo> Dr Dos; What is this monstrocity?
<Spectere> Aura 2
<asgromo> This thread is useless... I'll just... read the Featured Games article.
<asgromo> ... I'll just look for boners.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2005 5:58 am 
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*shuggles*
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Location: in madtom land
I like how it cut off just as it was about to get to the meaty bit

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this is a deep and meaningful quote


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2005 6:11 am 
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The Evil Avitor
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Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 11:09 pm
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Location: In a bakery shop on 32nd streat.
Dmanit.

That gave me wood. HARD wood...

Oh, bye the way... I thought this forrum was about ZZT the program that makes crappy games in ASCII TEXT MODE DOS games, not some stories of a guy trying to have sex with someone... COntinue with teh story!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2005 6:26 am 
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Level 17 Accordion Thief
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Joined: Fri Sep 12, 2003 1:41 am
Posts: 1423
Location: Edmonds, WA
Well, stuff that has to do with ZZT typically goes in one of the ZZT fora, such as ZZT General, <s>ZZT-OOP Programming</s>, ZZT Companies, or ZZT Projects. This forum is RAWR, so anything posted will likely contain stories of passionate love.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2005 6:28 am 
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The Evil Avitor
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Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 11:09 pm
Posts: 240
Location: In a bakery shop on 32nd streat.
@CheeseCakeAvenger
#end

:TOUCH
HI! I'm the ChEsEcAkE aVeNgEr!!!!!

$whatever man.

But I am!!!!!!

$chill! Ok! Ok!

Want to hear my sotry?

!yes;YES
!hellno;NO
#end

:hellno
...
/i/i
Fine! Be that way you bastard!
/i
#CHANGE yellow normal tigar
#CHANGE purple invisible red solid
MUAHAHA!!! DIEE!!!!!!!!
/i/i/i/i/i/i/i/i/i/i/i/i/i
#endgame
#end

:yes
Ok then! AHEM:
/i
I was stroling down the street
/i
and someone jumpted me. I was scared
/i
They took me to this hotel place
/i
and straped me down on a bed.
/i
They hand-couffed me
/i
This once girl drank this liquid, not sure what it was.
/i
The label said: Frence Fly
/i
Dont know what that is. Humph
/i/i/i
#SEND sexxxyyy:MOVE
#SEND sexmachine:DOIT
#SEND striper:STRIP
/i/i/i
Er....
/i/i/i
STRIPER: Give it to me baby! Ollala!
/i
#SEND striper:inout
/i/i/i/i/i
I'm sorry but you die of a heart attack.
Do you want another chance at life?

!nowayman;NO
!nowayman;NO
#end

:nowayman
Ok! Fine.
#endgame
#end


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2005 4:39 pm 
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OH YES! USE VINE WHIP! &lt;3
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Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2001 9:11 am
Posts: 1745
Location: scabsboro
more like

@admins
:loop
#if cheesecakeavenger BAN
#loop
:ban
BAN
#endgame
/i#ban

_________________
<asgromo> Dr Dos; What is this monstrocity?
<Spectere> Aura 2
<asgromo> This thread is useless... I'll just... read the Featured Games article.
<asgromo> ... I'll just look for boners.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2005 5:54 pm 
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The Evil Avitor
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Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 11:09 pm
Posts: 240
Location: In a bakery shop on 32nd streat.
Please be kind to the members while they graze on the internet.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2005 10:48 pm 
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███▄ ▀█ââ€
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Joined: Sat Dec 13, 2003 6:43 am
Posts: 251
shut the fuck up cheese


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 4:31 am 
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Level 17 Accordion Thief
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Joined: Fri Sep 12, 2003 1:41 am
Posts: 1423
Location: Edmonds, WA
C.A., try to limit the number of completely random things you do, Everybody else, be kind.

Cheesecake Avenger wrote:
Please be kind to the members while they graze on the internet.
'


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 5:14 am 
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<:D

Joined: Fri May 13, 2005 6:37 am
Posts: 886
Image

I WAS THERE TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
BEFORE EVERYTHING EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELSE
I WAS LIKE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU


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